Daily

Daily

011.

by Rachel-Rebecka
Credit to Poorly Drawn Lines

Me in a nutshell.

I’ve been in a bit of a funk lately. Doesn’t help that I’ve been battling the flu (it’s not Big Rona – thank Leviathan – it’s the other one) for the better part of the last month-and-a-half. I’m at the end of it now, thankfully, but the fatigue has been especially hard to shake. I haven’t been sick like this is probably four years, since I had Big Rona the first time. I’ve discovered that I turn into a giant blob of absolute fucking mess and an inconsolable infant when I get sick now, which is a recent development. I felt bad for Charlie for having to put up with me. I probably would have hit me with a stick.

Needless to say, all of my plans went onto the backburner, including my new diet protocol. I had also planned to start inventorying my mom’s things and going through what needs to be boxed up for my aunt, but that hasn’t happened yet either. Trying to psyche myself up isn’t working, and my brain just wants to scream when I think about everything I have to do before my trip to Terrance in July. I still haven’t even told my aunt that we’re coming yet or looked into hotels or anything.

I think it’s going to come down to just… doing it. Start in a corner and work my way through. Make a list and start crossing things off. I have a lot of hard decisions that I’m going to have to make and even though I don’t want to be the one to do it, it has to be done, and no one else in my family is stepping forward to do it. My dad’s attitude is just to shrug his shoulders at it. Which is a bit infuriating but I want to be sensitive to his grief, so I don’t give him shit about it.

The only really exciting thing that’s happened in the last little while is that for my birthday, my little family took a mini-trip to Kamloops. I got to go to the mall (which I didn’t know had a Torrid – I would have saved a few grand if I’d known), have some Popeye’s chicken and just spend time with Charlie and the kids and have some fun. Emilie got her ears pierced, which she’s been asking to do for a while now. I haven’t done the “birthday weekend” thing for a few years, so it was nice to get out for a while. The first night though, I ended up falling on my face in the parking lot and ripping my left knee open. Thankfully it didn’t impede to much of my fun, other than just being a bit annoying because my band-aids kept falling off in spots.

This was my favourite picture from the entire weekend:

The hotel we stayed at had a wonderful breakfast room that overlooked the river and an excellent continental breakfast. The coffee needed a bit of work, but it’s too be expected, I guess. Thankfully there was a very nice Starbucks close to where we were.

I’m thinking about starting book reviews again. I did a couple of reviews on my last blog, which I unfortunately lost, but I thought it might be fun to start those up again. Get some more lifeblood flowing in this little space. I might also dip my claws into album reviews… but I don’t know how that will go because I don’t have much interest in listening to anything other than William Control, Molchat Doma, and Sleep Token these days. We’ll see.

That’s all from me for now. Have an ear worm:

Morgan’s hair in this video… it makes me want to dye my hair red.

Daily Music Photodumping

009.

by Rachel-Rebecka

Happy 2024!

If you’re reading this, I hope you had a wonderful holiday season.

Mine turned out to be nice and quiet. On Christmas Eve, Charlie, the girls and myself went visiting with family and dropping off gifts. Poor Autumn was so tuckered out by the end of it, but we had a good time and it was nice to see everyone. It feels weird to me still to have other family in town outside my immediate family, but Charlie’s relatives have been very welcoming to me.

On Christmas day, with Charlie’s help, we made the big turkey dinner. The turkey turned out really well, so it was a pat on the back to myself, because cooking meat is really not my specialty and I had to wing it without a meat thermometer. Charlie’s mom, my sister and my brother-in-law came over, and it felt like a real “family dinner.” I’ve missed the feeling. It’s been so difficult since my mom passed away… things always feel off, and this was the first time since her passing that it didn’t.

For some reason or another, my brother decided not to come, which made me both sad and a little angry. We had a big talk when my mom passed that we would try our best to keep the family traditions going, and he was in agreement with that. I still haven’t sussed out what his reasoning is for bailing, but I’m leaving it alone for right now. I’m hoping he’ll tell me when he’s ready whatever it is going on with him.

I had the week between Christmas and New Years off, so I got to spend that time with Charlie and the girls, doing a bunch of nothing. I had planned to do a bunch of work around the house, but I rarely ever get downtime with my little family, so I decided to say “fuck it” and I put it off instead. Laundry will be there later, you know? New Years Eve was spent doing a bunch of nothing, and New Years day, I made a big chuck roast and we celebrated. (The leftovers made excellent beef dips, too.) Here’s a little photo dump:

Autumn doesn’t like her hat.
Breakfast at McDonald’s.
Tummy time.
Sleepy grinch.
Sleepy elf.
Little Grinch.

Things have been going well for me. Despite the sleep deprivation, I’m in a good headspace. I’m taking advantage of the residual energy from the Capricorn New Moon and now the Leo Full Moon, and setting some health goals. I finally got clearance from my obesity doctor to start on a diet plan called Optifast, now I’m just waiting for my product to arrive from back east. Going to start the year off with a bang, and see if I can’t make a decent dent into my journey to 175 lbs this year. I’ve already lost my baby weight, so it’s just the rest I need to work on. I renewed my membership to Body Groove (if you’re interested in the program – use my link for 10% off your first payment), so I’m going to utilize that. Charlie wants us to get a pass to the rec centre, so that’s another thing we’re going to do. I’m excited to go swimming again. I haven’t been since early in my pregnancy, and Autumn is going to love it.

Here is my latest earworm to share:

Have a wonderful day. 🙂

Daily Music

008.

by Rachel-Rebecka

I have been obsessed with this song since I first heard it and I must share it here with you all. Spotify only allows previews now, so please check out the full version if you like what you hear. I can’t get enough. 🙂

I hope you all are doing well. This week is going to be me busting my butt to get ready for Sol Invictus. I finally got the tree organized, now I just need to decorate it. I’m going to be doing some baking this week, with gingerbread men (or “gingerdead” men as my Emilie calls them because we always end up making them into zombies) being the big project to end the weekend. I figure if there’s anything that I miss, I’ll make a list to finish it all off next week. I have to talk to my sister about dinner still. She said that she was making it, but knowing my sister, something will come up and the ball will be thrown back to me. Not that I mind. I enjoy making turkey dinner.

As long as I can get at least a little sleep, I’m hopeful that I’ll get everything done. Autumn hasn’t been too generous with allowing me to sleep. My Emilie is excited and that’s enough for me to get excited and make it a celebration for her, even if it means I’ll be dragging myself around. Not to mention, this is Autumn’s first Sol Invictus, so I need to make it special for her, even if she won’t remember it. I wish the rest of my family cared about it, but it is what it is, I suppose. This haven’t been the same since my mom passed, and it sucks because often times it feels like I’m the only one trying.

I get the last week of December off, between Sol Invictus and New Years, and I am really looking forward to it. I never get time off, and I’m going to take advantage. Catch up on housework, spend some time with my daughters, prepare some witchery for the new years and get caught up on my covenwork. I’m also going to set aside some time to devote to this little space… get some graphics made, some content added, etc. I don’t care if anyone visits this blog, because I keep it for me, but it would be nice for the occasional soul that does visit to have some content to look at.

Anyhow. That’s all from me for now. I will post in the next few days with pictures of what I’m up to. 🙂